Leadership Spice

Employee engagement in India is under visible strain.

According to ADP, engagement levels have dropped to 19% in 2025 from 24% in 2024, marking one of the steepest declines globally. Alongside this, 30% of employees report daily stress, and nearly half the workforce is actively considering a job switch.

These are not just workforce statistics. They are signals. Signals that something in the way work is experienced is no longer working.

Employees today are asking for more than compensation and process. They are asking for flexibility, meaning, and more importantly – human connection at work. Yet, many organizations are still operating with structures that haven’t evolved at the same pace.

This is where the pressure on leadership has fundamentally changed. It is no longer just about delivering results. It is about restoring engagement through human leadership.

The IDP Paradox: Good Intent, Incomplete Impact

What I find that in response to growing disengagement, many organizations have doubled down on structured development interventions such as Individual Development Plans (IDPs).

On paper, this is a strong system. It brings structure to growth conversations. It creates visibility of aspirations. It encourages alignment between employee goals and organizational needs.

But somewhere between design and experience, a gap appears.

A significant amount of effort goes into creating templates, running development discussions, and documenting outcomes. Yet when employees move through these cycles, a recurring feedback is that they don’t feel any different. Though the intent exists and the process exists – the impact often does not land. The key reason for this is simple, yet uncomfortable – Leadership involvement is inconsistent, fragmented, or overly transactional. This again goes to show that development does not fail in HR systems but it fails in everyday leadership moments.

Why Leadership Behaviour Is the Real Intervention

At the heart of any development conversation are three critical leadership behaviours – authenticity, courage and empathy. When these are missing, even the best-designed IDP becomes a formality and when they are present, even a simple conversation can become transformational. The real opportunity lies not only in redesigning the system further, but in strengthening how leaders show up within it. This is also where AI can enter the picture.

AI as a Leadership Enabler, Not a Replacement

AI is already embedded in leadership workflows today without being explicitly named as such.

Leaders use AI to draft communication, summarize information, structure their thinking, prepare for conversations, and generate ideas. In many ways, it has become a silent thinking partner – helping leaders process complexity faster and work more efficiently.

Yet, amidst all these applications, one powerful use remains underexplored: using AI as a tool for reflection, self-awareness, and deeper leadership growth.

However, the one principle that must remain non-negotiable is that AI can support leadership but it cannot substitute it. Because the moment leadership becomes automated, development loses its human depth.

The value lies in the combination: AI for clarity. Leadership for connection.

The Deep Layer: Self-Awareness

Before AI can be used to support employee development, it must first be used to support something even more fundamental and that is Leader self-awareness. Because the quality of any development conversation is directly shaped by the internal patterns of the person leading it.

• How quickly do they listen vs. respond?
• What kinds of feedback do they resist?
• What situations trigger defensiveness?
• Where do they unconsciously avoid discomfort?

These patterns often operate below the surface of awareness. This is where AI, interestingly, can act as a mirror.

Using AI as a Reflection Partner

Unlike human interactions, AI does not adjust for hierarchy, emotion, or social pressure. It responds directly and without filtering intent based on what is shared with it. But when leaders begin to reflect on situations using AI, something subtle starts to happen.

A leader may describe a difficult conversation in detail, explain their response and interpretation, and then ask, “What might I not be seeing here?”

At first, the responses may feel generic. But over time, as the inputs become more honest and specific, patterns begin to emerge. It could be a tendency to close conversations too quickly. A discomfort with disagreement. A habit of interpreting questions as challenges. A need to solve before fully listening.

And this is where AI becomes interesting. It is not as a replacement for leadership wisdom, coaching, or human connection, but as a mirror that quietly reflects recurring tendencies leaders may not always notice in themselves.

The more authentic the reflection, the clearer the patterns become. Nothing entirely new but something newly visible and that’s where awareness begins.

From Self-Awareness to System Impact

When leaders begin to see themselves more clearly, something shifts externally as well. The IDP conversations become more present and meaningful. Feedback becomes less procedural and more developmental and employees feel seen, not just assessed. And when employees feel seen, engagement begins to rebuild.

Closing Thought: AI Is Not the Story – Leadership Is

AI will continue to evolve. Engagement metrics will continue to fluctuate. HR systems will continue to be refined. But the core truth of leadership remains unchanged. People do not disengage from work first. They disengage from how they are led. AI, when used thoughtfully, does not replace that responsibility but it amplifies it. It helps leaders see more clearly – but the choice of how to show up remains entirely human.

Thai Curry with AI touch

As always, love to end these blogs with a recipe. This time there’s a touch of AI to this. When I asked AI what to do differently with the curry, it suggested replacing coconut milk with vegetable stock, adding peanut butter for depth and finishing with lime to preserve freshness.

Then came the interesting part. As I cooked, I realized AI could suggest combinations…but it could not taste. It could recommend balance. But I had to feel when the balance was right. The curry needed slightly more warmth, less sweetness, more basil and less lime.

This is exactly what leadership with AI looks like. AI can accelerate clarity. It can widen perspective.
It can offer possibilities we may not immediately see. But leadership, like cooking, still depends on human judgment. Because people are not data points. Teams are not recipes. And culture cannot be automated.

The best leaders will not be those who reject AI. Nor those who blindly depend on it. They will be the ones who learn how to blend technological intelligence with human sensitivity.

Just like a good Thai curry. The recipe may come from AI. But the final flavour still depends on the person holding the ladle.

AI-Enhanced Thai Curry Recipe

Ingredients

• 1 tbsp oil
• 1 tbsp red curry paste
• 1 cup coconut milk (can be replaced or decreased)
• ½ cup vegetable stock
• 1 tsp peanut butter
• Mixed vegetables (bell peppers, broccoli, carrots, mushrooms)
• Tofu or chicken
• 1 tsp jaggery
• Soy sauce
• Thai basil
• Lime juice

Method

1. Sauté curry paste in oil.
2. Add coconut milk and stock.
3. Stir in peanut butter for depth.
4. Add vegetables in stages based on cooking time.
5. Add tofu or chicken.
6. Balance with jaggery and soy sauce.
7. Finish with basil and fresh lime juice.

Serve hot with jasmine rice.

The other morning, I was making idlis. There is something deeply calming about the process. The batter had fermented overnight, quietly transforming while no one was watching. I poured it gently into the moulds, placed them in the steamer, and closed the lid. And then, there was nothing to do. No stirring. No flipping. No constant checking.

Just listening.

The gentle sound of steam slowly building inside the vessel. The quiet rhythm telling you that something is happening, even though you cannot see it. If you open the lid too early, the idlis collapse. If the heat is too high, they dry out. If you ignore the steam, you miss the perfect moment.

Good idlis require patience. They require presence. They require listening.

And it struck me that leadership communication is very similar. Listening is not loud. It is not dramatic. But it transforms everything.

Listening: The Skill Leaders Talk About but Rarely Practice

In leadership conversations, we often talk about communication. We encourage leaders to be articulate, persuasive, and confident. We admire those who can speak well in town halls, influence stakeholders, and present compelling ideas. And somewhere along the way, communication became synonymous with speaking.

The leaders who create the deepest impact, however, are often those who listen well. Listening builds trust. It surfaces perspectives that may otherwise remain hidden. It creates psychological safety and encourages ownership. Most importantly, listening helps leaders understand before they decide.

And understanding is at the heart of meaningful leadership.

Nelson Mandela: The Power of Speaking Last

Nelson Mandela was known for his extraordinary listening ability. Those who worked with him often spoke about how he would sit quietly in meetings and allow everyone to share their perspectives, even the most junior members. He would listen without interrupting, absorbing the nuances of each viewpoint. Only after everyone had spoken would Mandela summarize the conversation and gently guide the group toward a decision.

Mandela often shared that he learned this approach from tribal leadership traditions, where the chief spoke last. The logic was simple yet profound. When the leader speaks first, others begin aligning their views to match the leader’s thinking. But when the leader listens first, people think more independently and speak more honestly.

Listening, in Mandela’s case, was not passive. It was deliberate leadership. It created trust, encouraged openness, and led to wiser decisions.

One of the most telling stories about Nelson Mandela’s listening comes from his time during the negotiations to end apartheid. Meetings were often tense, filled with deep mistrust, anger, and fear from all sides. Leaders arrived prepared to defend positions rather than explore solutions.

In one such meeting, Mandela sat quietly as leaders spoke passionately, sometimes emotionally, about their concerns and fears. Some expected him to intervene early and steer the conversation. But he didn’t. He allowed even those who strongly disagreed with him to speak at length. At one point, a younger leader expressed frustration that progress was too slow and criticized the negotiation approach. Many in the room shifted uncomfortably, unsure how Mandela would react. Instead of responding defensively, Mandela asked him to continue.

After everyone had spoken, Mandela leaned forward and calmly summarized each viewpoint, including the concerns of those who had criticized him. He acknowledged the fears, the frustrations, and the hopes expressed in the room. Then he said something simple:
“If we do not understand one another’s fears, we cannot build one another’s future.”

The tone of the room shifted. People felt heard. The conversation softened. Positions became more flexible. And the meeting moved forward with renewed trust.

Those who worked with Mandela often said that this was his quiet strength. He did not dominate conversations. He created space for them. And in doing so, he helped transform conflict into collaboration.

Listening, for Mandela, was not silence. It was leadership in action.

Satya Nadella: Listening That Transformed Culture

When Satya Nadella took over as CEO of Microsoft, the company was technically strong but culturally fragmented. Teams were competing internally, and collaboration was limited. Many leaders in this situation might have responded with sweeping announcements and bold directives.

Nadella chose a different path. He began by listening.

He spent time meeting employees across levels, hearing their experiences and challenges. He spoke with customers to understand what they valued and what they felt was missing. He engaged partners and stakeholders, gathering insights from different corners of the ecosystem.

One of the most powerful examples of Satya Nadella’s listening came early in his tenure at Microsoft, when he gathered his senior leadership team for an offsite meeting. Instead of beginning with strategy, numbers, or market share discussions, Nadella did something unexpected. He invited a group exercise on empathy.

The leaders were asked to read a passage and reflect on how they felt. What followed was telling. Many leaders approached the exercise analytically, focusing on facts rather than emotions. Nadella noticed this and gently pointed out something important – Microsoft had become a company that valued intelligence and expertise, but had lost touch with empathy and listening.

He then shared a deeply personal story about his son, who was born with severe disabilities. Nadella spoke about how that experience changed him and how he initially focused on “fixing” the situation, but over time learned to listen, understand, and empathize. He spoke about learning to see the world from another person’s perspective.

The room grew quiet. This wasn’t a typical leadership offsite conversation. But it shifted something fundamental.

Nadella connected empathy with innovation. He emphasized that if Microsoft wanted to build meaningful products, leaders had to listen – not just to customers, but to each other.

That conversation became a turning point.

Leaders began encouraging cross-team collaboration. Silos started breaking down. Conversations became more open. The cultural shift from “know-it-all” to “learn-it-all” began not with strategy, but with listening.

Nadella later reinforced this message repeatedly that innovation begins with understanding unmet and unarticulated needs. And understanding begins with listening.

What emerged from these conversations was a shift in mindset. Nadella began emphasizing a “learn-it-all” culture instead of a “know-it-all” one. This seemingly simple shift had a profound impact. Collaboration improved, innovation increased, and employee engagement strengthened.

Listening, in this case, did not just shape conversations. It reshaped culture.

Abraham Lincoln: Listening to Dissent

Abraham Lincoln demonstrated another dimension of listening. He surrounded himself with people who disagreed with him. His cabinet included political rivals, individuals who held strong and often opposing views. Instead of avoiding disagreement, Lincoln encouraged it. He listened carefully to debates, absorbing arguments from multiple perspectives before making decisions.

This approach helped him navigate one of the most difficult periods in history. By listening to dissenting voices, Lincoln avoided blind spots and strengthened his decision-making. Listening, for him, was not about agreement. It was about wisdom.

One of the most powerful examples of Abraham Lincoln’s listening came during the discussions around the Emancipation Proclamation.

Lincoln had already drafted the proclamation that would declare enslaved people in Confederate states free. It was one of the most consequential decisions of his presidency. Many leaders in his position might have simply announced it.

Instead, Lincoln brought the draft to his cabinet – a group that included political rivals and strong personalities, such as William H. Seward and Salmon P. Chase. He read the document aloud and asked for their views. Some cabinet members supported it strongly. Others were cautious. Seward, in particular, advised Lincoln to delay the announcement. He believed that issuing it at that moment especially when the Union had suffered setbacks might make it appear as an act of desperation rather than strength.

Lincoln listened carefully. He did not dismiss the advice, even though he had already made up his mind about the direction. Instead, he reflected on Seward’s concern and chose to wait. Months later, after the Union victory at the Battle of Antietam, Lincoln issued the Emancipation Proclamation. The timing gave the decision greater strength and credibility. Lincoln later acknowledged that Seward’s advice had influenced his decision.

This was listening in action. Lincoln did not surround himself with agreement.
He surrounded himself with perspective. And by listening to dissent, he made one of the most important leadership decisions in history with greater wisdom and impact.

Steve Jobs: Learning to Listen

Steve Jobs, in his early leadership years, was known for his brilliance and intensity. He was also known for dismissing ideas quickly and pushing strongly for his own vision. While this created innovation, it also created friction within teams and contributed to challenges during his first stint at Apple.

When Jobs returned years later, colleagues noticed a shift. He still had strong opinions, but he listened more carefully. He focused on fewer ideas, engaged more deeply with design teams, and allowed discussions to evolve before making decisions. This evolution helped Apple create some of its most iconic products. Listening did not dilute Jobs’ leadership. It refined it.

One of the most revealing examples of Steve Jobs’ shift as a listener came during the development of the iMac after his return to Apple. During the iMac development, designers presented multiple prototypes – different colors, shapes, and materials. Instead of immediately declaring his preference, Jobs asked questions. He walked around the models, touched them, and invited the team to explain their thinking.

One designer later recalled that Jobs spent a long time listening to why translucent colors might make technology feel less intimidating and more approachable for everyday users. This was a different Steve Jobs who was curious, engaged, and willing to explore perspectives.

Initially, even Jobs wasn’t sure about the bold translucent design. But as he listened to the team’s reasoning and discussed possibilities, he became convinced. The result was the iconic translucent blue iMac which was a radical departure from the beige computers of the time. The iMac went on to become one of Apple’s most successful products and played a major role in reviving the company.

What changed wasn’t just the design. It was the conversation. Jobs still had strong instincts, but he allowed ideas to develop. He listened long enough for creativity to surface. Listening, in this case, didn’t slow innovation. It made it possible.

Listening in Everyday Leadership

In my work with leaders, I often notice that many genuinely believe they are listening. Yet, in reality, they are preparing responses, evaluating ideas, or thinking about the next question. The conversation continues, but the listening is partial.

I remember working with a senior business leader during a leadership development engagement. He was respected, decisive, and highly experienced. Yet his team consistently gave feedback that he did not listen. His response during our first coaching session was immediate and honest – “I do listen. I just move quickly to solutions.”

As we explored further, I asked him to reflect on what happened internally when someone brought him a problem. He paused for a moment and then admitted something interesting. The moment someone started speaking, he felt responsible for solving the issue. His mind would immediately begin working on solutions. While the person was still explaining, he was already thinking ahead. He believed that as a leader, he was expected to have answers. Listening, in his mind, meant that he had to respond with a solution. And if he didn’t have one, he worried it would make him appear ineffective.

Over a few coaching conversations, a deeper fear surfaced. He shared that early in his career, he had built his reputation as someone who solved problems quickly. People relied on him for answers. Over time, that became part of his identity. Slowing down and listening felt risky. What if he did not have the answer? What if silence made him look uncertain?

This insight changed everything.

We experimented with small shifts. Instead of responding immediately, he began asking one additional question. Then he began summarizing what he heard before offering suggestions. Sometimes, he simply acknowledged the concern and asked the team member what they thought might work.

Initially, he described the silence as uncomfortable. But gradually, something interesting happened. His team began speaking more openly. They started bringing more thoughtful ideas. Conversations became richer.

He later reflected that when he stopped jumping in with answers, his team began thinking more independently. Listening no longer meant solving everything immediately. Instead, it created space for others to explore solutions, take ownership, and contribute more meaningfully.

True listening requires presence. It requires slowing down. It requires allowing silence.

Silence, however, can feel uncomfortable. Many leaders feel compelled to fill gaps quickly, fearing that silence may signal uncertainty. Yet, silence often reveals what words do not. A hesitation, a change in tone, or something left unsaid can provide deeper insight than long explanations.

These are the subtle signals of communication. They are quiet, like steam building inside an idli steamer. But they tell you everything you need to know.

My Soft Idli Recipe – With Secret Ingredients

Over time, I discovered that small, thoughtful additions make idlis softer and more flavorful. Two ingredients that I always add are fenugreek seeds and a tablespoon of poha. They work quietly in the background, but the difference is unmistakable – much like listening in leadership.

Ingredients

2 cups idli rice
1 cup urad dal (split, skinless)
1 teaspoon fenugreek seeds
1 tablespoon poha (flattened rice)
Salt to taste
Water as required

Preparation Time

Soaking: 6–8 hours
Fermentation: 8–10 hours
Cooking Time: 10–12 minutes

Method

Wash and soak the rice in one bowl for 6–8 hours. In a separate bowl, soak the urad dal along with the fenugreek seeds for the same duration. The fenugreek seeds help improve fermentation and add softness to the idlis.

Just before grinding, soak the poha in a little water for about 5 minutes. This helps it soften and blend smoothly into the batter.

Grind the urad dal and fenugreek seeds first, adding water gradually to create a smooth and fluffy batter. Transfer it to a large bowl. Then grind the rice to a slightly coarse texture and add it to the same bowl.

Add the soaked poha and mix everything gently using your hand. Mixing by hand helps incorporate air and supports better fermentation.

Add salt lightly if you prefer before fermentation, or after fermentation based on your preference. Cover the batter and allow it to ferment overnight in a warm place.

The next morning, you will notice the batter has risen and become light. Grease the idli moulds lightly, pour the batter, and place them in a steamer.

Close the lid and allow the idlis to cook in steam for about 10–12 minutes. This is where listening becomes important. The gentle sound of steam tells you the process is working. Avoid opening the lid too early. Allow the idlis to rise quietly.

Once done, remove gently and allow them to cool slightly before taking them out.

Soft, fluffy idlis are ready.

The Leadership Parallel

Just like fenugreek seeds and poha quietly transform idlis, listening also works quietly in leadership. Curiosity, humility, patience, and empathy are not loud behaviors. But they soften conversations, improve understanding, and create deeper connections.

Listening allows ideas to ferment. It allows conversations to rise. It creates space for insight.

Good communication is not about saying more. It is about understanding more.

Like idlis rising quietly in steam, listening happens without noise. Yet when done well, it transforms conversations, relationships, and leadership.

Sometimes, the most powerful leadership move is to close the lid, listen to the steam, and allow ideas to rise.

That is the true spice of leadership.

I once conducted a power dressing workshop for a group of accomplished women. They walked in expecting rules – colours, silhouettes, dos and don’ts. What they carried instead was something far heavier: uncertainty. Many of them were also quietly surprised when I walked in wearing a sari. I could sense the unspoken expectation. People assumed that a session on power dressing would be led by someone in a sharp suit. Instead, what they saw was me, comfortable, grounded, and fully myself.

As the session unfolded, something became clear to me. The real struggle wasn’t about clothes. It was about permission. The permission to show up as themselves and still feel powerful. That day, power dressing quietly transformed into a deeper conversation about executive presence.

Executive presence begins long before you speak

Executive presence is often described in terms of polish. It is posture, articulation, attire. It is not only about how you look but also about gravitas, communication and impactful influence.

In my experience, people don’t shift by adhering to inherited rules about professionalism. They shift when something feels right on the inside. You see it instantly in the way their shoulders drop, their voices settle, and their presence expands without effort.

I remember one participant who kept adjusting her blazer, asking if the colour worked, if the fit was “correct.” I asked her to try wearing something she already felt confident in. The change was instant. She stopped fidgeting. She stood still. When she spoke next, the room listened, not because she looked different, but because she felt different.

That was the point I wanted to convey: executive presence isn’t worn. It’s felt – and when it is, others feel it too.

Presence, diversity, and the myth of the suit

Over the years, especially in global or cross-cultural contexts, I’ve heard this belief repeatedly:

“I need to wear a suit to be taken seriously.” As though confidence arrives stitched into a blazer.

But I’ve seen powerful executive presence in saris, in salwar kameez, in clothing that carries culture, comfort, and conviction. What made the difference was not conformity but it was ease with identity.

One only has to look at Sudha Murthy. Whether she is speaking in international forums or engaging with grassroots communities, she shows up exactly as she is. She remains rooted. Her presence is understated and unmistakably authoritative. Her presence does not come from what she wears. It comes from the knowledge and values she carries. Her clarity when speaking also contributes significantly.

Global does not mean Western. Professional does not mean uniform. Presence does not mean performance. True executive presence comes from being grounded, not disguised – and from a humility that doesn’t need to announce itself.

What paella taught me about executive presence and diversity

Food, as it often does, gave me the metaphor I was looking for.

A good paella looks impressive, but its real strength lies beneath the surface. Seafood, chicken, rice, spices, each ingredient keeps its identity. Nothing tries to dominate. Nothing gets diluted. Just like the way executive presence works too – distinct elements coming together without losing themselves.

Paella works because the base (the sofrito) is strong. Flavours are layered patiently. Diversity is respected rather than blended into sameness. That, for me, is executive presence. Not imitation. Not loudness. But integration. Presence emerges when confidence, competence, values, and culture coexist – without one canceling the other.

Executive presence is cultural confidence

When leaders feel they must look like someone else to lead effectively, something vital is lost. Presence begins to thin when authenticity is compromised, when energy is spent managing appearances instead of holding one’s ground. When we try to fit an external template of leadership, we drift further. We move away from the inner steadiness that makes presence believable.

What truly brings out the best in you is not a suit, a style, or a borrowed version of professionalism. It is your confidence, your values, your cultural grounding – and, most importantly, your comfort with who you are. That comfort shows up in subtle ways. It is evident in how you listen and how you pause. It also shows in how you speak without rushing to prove a point.

Presence isn’t about standing out. It’s about standing rooted.

LeadershipSpice Recipe: Chicken & Seafood Paella

Because leadership, like paella, works best when diversity is intentional

Ingredients

• 1½ cups short-grain rice (paella rice or arborio)
  
• 4 cups warm chicken stock
  
• 3 tbsp olive oil
  
• 1 onion, finely chopped
  
• 4 cloves garlic, minced
  
• 1 large tomato, grated
  
• 1 tsp smoked paprika
  
• A pinch of saffron (optional but traditional)
  
• 300 g chicken (thigh or breast), bite-sized
  
• 200 g prawns, cleaned and deveined
  
• ½ cup calamari rings or fish chunks (optional)
  
• 1 cup bell peppers (mixed colours)
  
• ½ cup green beans
  
• Salt and pepper to taste
  
• Fresh parsley or coriander for garnish
• Lemon wedges for serving

Method

1. Heat olive oil in a wide, shallow pan. Season chicken lightly and sear until golden. Remove and set aside.
   
2. In the same pan, add onion and garlic. Sauté gently until soft — this is the foundation, don’t rush it.
   
3. Add grated tomato and smoked paprika. Cook slowly until the sofrito thickens and deepens in flavour.
   
4. Stir in the rice, coating every grain evenly.
   
5. Pour in warm stock, add saffron, salt, and pepper. Spread the rice evenly and do not stir again.
   
6. Arrange chicken, seafood, and vegetables on top. Let the paella cook undisturbed until the rice absorbs the liquid.
   
7. Add prawns towards the end so they stay tender.
   
8. Switch off heat, cover, and let the paella rest for a few minutes. Garnish with herbs and lemon.

A final reflection

Paella doesn’t succeed by making everything taste the same. It succeeds by allowing difference to shine on a strong, steady base.

Executive presence works the same way. Presence isn’t built by becoming someone else. You don’t need to erase your culture to belong. When confidence, values, and identity align, presence follows – quietly, unmistakably.

I have just returned from an unforgettable 8-day journey through Egypt. It’s a land where time slows down. History whispers from every stone. Human ambition has quite literally been carved into the earth. The presence of the Pyramids of Giza is overwhelming. The Valley of the Kings offers a quiet, almost hushed atmosphere. Egypt has a way of making you pause and reflect.

Any journey we undertake becomes truly meaningful and memorable not just because of the destination. It is also meaningful because of the company we keep along the way.

I travelled with two friends I have known for over 40 years. Friendships of this length don’t need constant validation. They rest on shared history and deep trust. An ease comes from having seen each other through multiple phases of life. This journey carried an added significance. We were travelling to celebrate one friend turning sixty. This milestone invited both joy and quiet reflection.

And yet, when three people stay together in a completely different country for eight full days, differences inevitably surface. They navigate unfamiliar food, long travel hours, packed itineraries, and physical fatigue.

That’s where the leadership lessons quietly began . Influence, Clarity, and Evolution (the ICE of SPICE) started to show up in small, human moments.

When History Isn’t Your First Love But People Are

Let me begin with an honest confession. I am not someone who naturally gravitates toward history or museums. I don’t seek out timelines, dynasties, or detailed narratives of the past. My two friends, however, are deeply curious. They love the context, symbolism, and stories that bring ancient places to life.

For eight days, I played along. I walked through temples, tombs, and museums. I listened attentively and asked questions. I stayed present even when my natural inclination may have been otherwise.

Somewhere along the way, clarity dawned. Experience has a way of teaching us, even when we don’t want the lesson. Leadership is not about personal preference. It is about collective experience. Just like in organisations, leaders often need to engage with areas that may not excite them personally. It could be processes, details, legacy systems, or stakeholder expectations. What matters is not enthusiasm, but respect.

An Unexpected Test of Leadership: The Fall at the Pyramids

Our leadership lessons did not remain philosophical for long.

On Day 2 of the trip, effectively our first full day of sightseeing, I had a bad fall at the Pyramids of Giza and sprained my ankle badly. The pain was intense. Walking became difficult. And suddenly, our carefully planned itinerary was thrown off course.

That evening, we were meant to go on a much-awaited Nile cruise dinner. It is one of those experiences you mentally bookmark long before the trip begins. It had to be cancelled.

Of course, we were all disappointed, but not a hint of it showed on their faces. I was so touched by their response. There was no frustration or irritation or any subtle pressure to push through. Both of them were constantly checking on me to ensure my comfort and helping me with managing the pain. They quietly took charge of the execution. They put backup plans in place. This ensured that the rest of the trip could still move forward.

This was a great demonstration of crisis management at its best – not dramatic, not heroic, just deeply human.

By the next day, the pain and swelling had reduced. I could walk better, and we gently eased back into the itinerary with adjustments, patience, and flexibility. The trip continued not because the plan was rigid, but because the people were resilient.

Leadership is revealed most clearly when plans fall apart.

Three Friends. Three Leadership Styles.

The entire experience of this trip revealed something beautiful – not only about our friendship but about leadership as well.

Each of us brought a distinct style. We all demonstrated multiple styles during different situations. At various moments we were compassionate, go-getters and integrators. This balance of adjusting while speaking up prevented assumptions, guilt, or overcompensation. Eight days together could easily have led to friction. Instead, I think we evolved with our roles flexed, pace adjusted, and trust deepened. Leadership flowed so naturally in every situation, respectfully, and without any ego.

The Pyramids: Leadership Built to Last

Standing before the Pyramids of Giza is humbling. Photos do not prepare you for their scale or intention. These structures were not built for speed or short-term validation. They represent leadership designed to influence across generations, grounded in long-term clarity of purpose. They were built for endurance.

They remind us that meaningful leadership rests on strong foundations, demands long term thinking and is never a solo effort. Standing before the pyramids, I felt a quiet question arise within me as a leader. What am I building today? Will it still matter when I am no longer around to lead?

The Valley of the Kings: Quiet Strength & Inner Work

If the pyramids represent visible leadership, the Valley of the Kings represents the unseen.

It is hidden, introspective, and silent. It speaks of preparation and inner alignment. This clarity enables leaders to evolve without losing themselves. It reminded me that not all leadership work is visible. Some of the most powerful leadership occurs in quiet spaces. In these spaces, clarity is honed. Ego is softened there. Decisions are anchored in purpose rather than pressure.

Another important reminder it gave me was that reflection is as critical as action. Reflection helps create inner clarity. Without pausing to reflect, action can become reactive or misdirected. In the absence of inner clarity, even well-intentioned effort can scatter. When clarity is cultivated within, it sharpens judgment, anchors choices, and significantly amplifies outer impact.

Friendship as the Ultimate Leadership Classroom

Leadership is not learned only in boardrooms or classrooms and this journey reinforced this. Leadership is learned while navigating differences without ego, honouring strengths that are not your own, and choosing connection over control.

Forty years of friendship doesn’t mean the absence of differences. It means the ability to evolve together, without eroding respect or connection. It means knowing how to hold them.

Ending with Sweetness: Date & Cinnamon Khunafa

Every Leadership Spice reflection ends where it began – with food.

Because leadership, much like cooking, is about balance, timing, and heart.

Date & Cinnamon Khunafa

Ingredients:

• 1 cup khunafa pastry (shredded)
• 2 tbsp melted butter or ghee
• ½ cup soft dates, chopped
• ½ tsp cinnamon powder
• ¼ cup sugar
• ¼ cup water
• Rose or orange blossom water (optional)

Method:

1. Toast khunafa lightly in butter or ghee until golden.
2. Layer half in a pan, add dates mixed with cinnamon.
3. Top with remaining khunafa and press gently.
4. Cook on low heat until crisp on both sides.
5. Pour warm syrup over hot khunafa.

Sweet. Grounded. Comforting.

Much like friendships that endure and leadership that lasts.